I Know It's Wrong But...

It's just too funny to pass up.

Thanks Nick Yu for sending this over

The Joker Scares the Shit Out of Me | Does Heath Ledger Deserve An Oscar? *SPOILERS*

So I watched The Dark Knight a couple nights ago...a day after opening night. Yes, I waited in line for an hour and bought the tickets a day before and lined up behind a bunch of over-weight, popcorn guzzling comic book nerds that feel they know Batman in person. It was a pain. And I know many of you have not seen it yet, but I don't care...I'm gonna write about it anyway.

Some people have made ridiculous claims that Heath Ledger is only getting oscar votes because of his tragic death half a year ago. I've even heard some people claim that Heath Ledger faked his death as a publicity stunt. Jesus, everyone's so skeptical these days. I say to all those people...please watch the movie first before you judge and make pretentious statements. If Heath's being considered for an oscar, it's because he now made The Joker the last person in the world I want to meet.

I, for one, was against all the hype of The Dark Knight because of all the people that assumed this was a good movie before they even saw it. I wanted to see it because Batman Begins, the prequel, was amazing and a sequel with The Joker was only going to make it more interesting. Anyways, I'm just going to say it now...Heath definitely deserves an Oscar for this movie, and I'm pretty sure he's going to win. He sizzled every time he was on screen and he made me squirm in my seat every time he spoke in that psychotic voice. His voice was just so twisted and the way he constantly licked his lips just gave me the impression that Heath was legitimately insane. It was chilling, but I wanted more. I wanted more psycho Heath. I thought about it for awhile and I know he deserves an oscar, and it's not just because he died half a year ago. If you just see him on screen, he's so twisted, so dark, so eerie...it's nothing like Heath. The Knight's Tale Heath or even the Brokeback Mountain Heath don't even compare to how far he had to reach to encompass the essence of The Joker. The whole movie, I didn't even process that Heath Ledger was playing The Joker, it's not even Heath at all. I swear to God, I saw evil in him.

Wait, I just lied, there was ONE moment in which I processed The Joker was Heath Ledger. It's the moment where he fires a rocket during the car chase and the recoil flings his hair in front of him...and I processed, just for that moment, that Joker was played by that guy from A Knight's Tale. But it's okay, it was just one moment.

Now, I still gotta give a shout out to The Joker's makeup crew and the movie's writers...especially the writers (they're always forgotten) who created this character...because although Heath acted it out...it's the writers that gave him the incredibly sick dialogue that will stick with me in my nightmares.
My nightmares, oh god...I can see it now...The Joker's maniacal laugh echoes throughout the room as he slowly slices my mouth open with a blade. Then, he'll grab the sides of my head before I topple over and stare into my drowsy eyes...tilting his head slightly to the left and smiling from cheek to cheek with his scarred face...and then he'll whisper to me...

"why so serious?"

THIS JUST IN... GOKU IS WHITE | The New Dragon Ball Z Movie

Wtf Wtf Wtf Wtf Wtf.

I grew up watching Dragon Ball Z. Many people from my generation did. And many of these loyal fans were led to believe that the lead character, Goku, was of asian descent (or at least looked it, because technically he's an alien, but that's too complicated to explain). Anyways, according to the new live action DBZ movie, we were wrong. Apparently, Goku is white. And Justin Chatwin will portray his character. Now, somebody tell me why on earth can't this crew of asians (Director James Wong, Producer Stephen Chow) just say "fuck the money" and put in an asian as the lead role as it should be? Maybe they can sleep better at night if they do so. In my opinion this movie will lose money anyways seeing as though the lead actor is a white boy...and all the loyal asian fans that would have wanted to see this live action DBZ movie would now throw it aside while mumbling "pff" under the breath. Now, don't call me a hypocrite because I don't want a white guy playing an asian character, I'm just playing this fair. If the original manga casted Goku as a character of caucasian descent, then fine...just like I'm fine with all the other Hollywood movies filled with Caucasians as the lead roles. I'm just saying, some movies have already pushed the Asians into backup roles when they shouldn't have... and I'm sick of seeing it. Like, honestly, are people of races other than asians going to squint at the screen and refuse to pay money just because an asian is playing the lead role in a movie that is based on a Japanese manga? If so, they are racist, and if I ever have the opportunity of creating a movie, there's no way I'm catering to racists.

Hancock | I Only Saw Half of A Movie...

Oh...it was so close. The first hour is so good...almost great, mainly because Will Smith is so very charasmatic. The premise of this story is also very original and almost brilliant. Jason Bateman is flawless, and hilarious whenever he's on screen. But...man...seriously the last half of this movie (after that very confusing and very horrible plot twist) was just garbage. Like COME ON! Even after the disappointing twist I was hoping the movie would turn it around and give us a satisfying ending. Or, at the very least, tell us what in the world was going on! Ugh. Give me half my money back.

Oscars are BORING | Watch MTV Movie Awards

This past february I watched the Oscars, which sucked. I found myself flipping through a magazine after about 15 minutes of this overrated annual event. The sketches are corny and the event is just too formal and too unappealing. I guess i'm not the target audience, being a 20 year old movie fanatic. Either way, the 2008 MTV MOVIE AWARDS hosted by Mike Myers less than a month ago were incredibly entertaining even though I didn't fully agree with all the final decisions (but that's not the point). Watch the full event HERE. The crowd gave a standing ovation when the Wayne's World set appeared on stage. Golden, love you Mike Myers. The Love Guru looks stupid though.